our life
by xxunowhoxx
Summary: freddie looks back on his and sams life. my first Seddie story, please let me know what this is like.


Hey Hey!!! Here is my oneshot/ drabble which kinda stemmed from the episode IKiss, it is my first Seddie fic so please review and be nice.

**DISCLAIMER!!!!! : I DON'T AND NEVER WILL OWN ICARLY. ******** I DO HOWEVER OWN THE LAPTOP I AM WRITING ON AS WELL AS THE FIC.**

**PLEASE READ AND ENJOY!!**

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I remember the time when we hated each other, the time where insults were a daily routine of ours. A time where I hadn't exactly found myself, thinking I was in love with Carly when in fact it was you I loved. It was then that I found myself when I realized who exactly loved.

I remember when you were so sure of yourself but it turned out it was all a front for show. Where you built up a wall as a protection in which you only allowed Carly to enter.

I remember our first kiss, the kiss that brought us together, the kiss that shouldn't have happened, the kiss that only exists because you came to your senses and felt guilty to what you caused, the kissed that allowed me in through your high thick wall. I remember the aftermath of our first kiss, the awkwardness between us, the lies we went through to cover it up from Carly. The motivation that caused us to put our differences aside and helped our decision to go out.

I remember our first date, how the date didn't go to plan, how we ended up getting lost on our way there by bus, how the waiter got your order mixed up which ended with you losing your appetite that evening. Then on our way back how you were splashed by the puddle when the bus drive past you into the large one in the middle of the road that had the remains from the down pour from earlier that day.

I remember telling our friends of our official status of being a couple half way through 9th grade. How their reactions weren't what we planned for, they were better than expected. How Carly's reaction was shocking by the response given was 'at last'

I remember our time as a couple from 9th grade to 12th, how we rarely had any major fallouts just our normal banter which was still present from the past. Especially the torment you usually gave me about my mother.

I remember when you dad got sick just before you graduated before you went off to college. How you blocked everyone else out except me. How Carly wasn't able to fulfill her role of bestfriend. How when your dad got worst you didn't contact anyone else except me. How you allowed me even more through your wall.

I remember your dad's funeral, how silent you were, how vulnerable and broken you were, with a slight tear falling down on you cheek every so often. Not wanting to let people see you cry, how you only really cried in the privacy of your own bedroom with me in. how whenever you remember him would always have you ending in tears, how I would comfort you till sunrise in many occasions.

I remember the first day you started college, the day that you really wanted your dad for the first time since his death. How we made a pact that no matter what happened we will still be together or if that failed at least we would still be friends.

I remember when we both finished college, you with your degree in business just like your father and me in computing, how we made it through again without any major fallouts or arguments, how our constant meet ups allowed us to stay closer than others we know.

I remember when we finally moved in with each other. How you wanted to make it personal but not too girly for you to live in. how my mothers acceptance off you to her made you ten times happier than I have ever seen you since your dad died, how you wanted to incorporate Spencer's sculptures into your apartment

I remember when Carly always popped over to visit, just like you did to her in our teens. How you didn't mind her staying even though you remember me having a crush on her. Also that you managed to further in your chosen career choice.

I remember the day you started your own business. The business which resulted in doing well, the business which turned you wealthy, a multi millionaire to be exact, how we kept our relationship strong we was not that much of an amazement.

I remember the day YOU asked ME to marry you, I always knew you weren't conventional and did things your way but I thought that you would at least let me ask you. How the way you asked me was the way you wanted to be asked yourself, in your favourite restaurant on the night I was going to ask you in fact and instead of rings exchanged it was a watch from you to me and a necklace with a gold pendant on the chain from me to you.

I remember our wedding day, you looked stunning in your white wedding dress, how you didn't want to go mad and spend way too much, the way you allowed Carly to pick her own maid of honour dress. The day was perfect, it got even better when we ended the day with you as my wife.

I remember a couple of years later when we were going on holiday and fell in love with the toddler in our row on the plane, how you brought up the topic of kids, how you had finally broke down that wall and how you had at last let people see the real you.

I remember how you told me the exciting news, how your face looked when you told me the news that you were pregnant after many months of trying, how you couldn't keep it a secret.

I remember when I took you to your first ultrasound, how nervous you were and how you let the breath you were holding finally out as soon as the doctor said that everything was fine.

I remember that day on your second ultrasound how shocked you were when the doctor told you that you were in fact carrying twins. How the fact that your grandfather was a twin completely slipped your and that our chances were higher of conceiving twins due to the fact that my mum is a twin as well.

I remember when Justin and Amber were born you had converted to your former self. Always insulting me one way or another. I took it as I always did, I knew it was because of your pain you were feeling during the birth. I hated seeing you in this much pain. I held your hand for the whole thing. I remember you looked ready to give up as soon as Justin was born before Amber but you didn't want me to see you as weak.

I remember the hours following their birth, how exhausted you were. You slept for ages but it left me to spend time with our little angels. Amber was so petite that she fitted between my palm to the crook of my elbow, she looked so safe.

I remember the twins growing up, how you found it hard to cope but stuck with it, how you worked at home to make sure you can be there for them unlike your mother was for you. How you made sure Justin was able to join all the clubs he wanted such as soccer and karate, or how you allowed Amber to do ballet even though you didn't really approve and how you made sure they got into private schools so they would get the best education even if you didn't really take notice of it until you reached high school.

I remember the day the twins graduated from high school, Amber the top of the class taking after me in academics and Justin taking after you in his attitude and behaviour, I also remember you sitting next to me with a massive smile on your face implying that you are happy and proud of the both.

I remember the day Amber got married and how you had tears in your eyes throughout the whole ceremony. I could tell that you were remembering our wedding day. At least Amber had both parents at her wedding unlike you. I can remember the day Justin married and you were the same during his ceremony too.

I remember the day our first grandchild was born, how you were there for Jennifer as I was there for you. How you were there for Justin, consoling him after Jennifer sadly died during child birth, how you held Amber's hand during the delivery of her set of twins Ruby and Onyx. How you guided both of our children in the raising of theirs

I remember you had you check up at the doctors and you found out that you had cancer. How you finally broke down completely and couldn't take the fact that you may not actually be alive in a few month/years and that you will be very weak.

I remember the day you were told you had gone into remission, we had the whole family over to celebrate, then six years later it returned and you were cruelly snatched from everyone who ever loved you including myself.

**I remember**__**I was your first kiss and your **

**Last.**


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